Tuesday, July 18, 2006


so i'm officially sleeving(tattooing) my left arm and i will begin deep meditation tonight to gain some clarity on the permanent change to my body. spirit.ego.energy.consciousness.et al. feels like:

hot infernos burn
inside consuming
all of me
leaving nothing
but ashes.
This One is
a Sacrifice
for loving Goddess Kali
to gracefully dance
gleefully upon,
tenderly shredding
skin, bones and blood.
All which remains;
vivid rhythm,
radiant sun,


---and on to something else that's on my gemini brain.

i, India, Am realising that the 'seekers' quest is ... a waste of time.

What is to find, that isn't already present?
What is there to gain, when one already has everything right now?
Just the act of seeking is itself the acknowledgement of not being whole.
Why teach with words when silence itself is the communication knowledge present within?

Freedom? It's always at hand, one just has to Be free. Nothing holds, nothing chains, nothing ... or, no-thing ever changes. Our essence is bound by nothing, and the' no-thing' which we are is eternal and ultimately powerful, and ... within that space there is nothing to do or prove.

What am I trying to transcend and grow past? Illusions that don't exist ... it's like jogging on a treadmill in front of a giant virtual reality television screen or somthing similiar.

eye'm learning to turn off the machine and go live.

Living? What is that? Living only happens when a person stops serving their delusions and illusions, and serves the Essence of their being, the Essence found in all life and energy, with their Whole Heart, Mind and Doing. One lives when serving that Essence as they are meant to. Which, for me, hasn't unfolded fully, but .. hey, its all about the journey and not just the big chocolate or prehaps rainbow cake at the end.

It's pretty simple. I already found it, but it's so simple, so my ego attempts to still doubt it.

blah! ;) but give thanks dammit!

Saturday, July 15, 2006

can you spot my big ass head in this revolution?

hint: i'm wearing a baseball cap - there a glass of sissurp in my hand- and my mouth is wide open. haha! this is so incriminating and i swear i don't drink--lolol. i was holding that glass for one of sisters who'd just finishing catching the spirit in the moshpit. altho' she's not dancing now, i swear she was and who knows why i am still holding the drink. LOL. i found this on the Afropunk site and this was punk show at the Delancey in NY. Check out the DVD on netflix; it's fascinating. it's apart of my collection. it's a beautiful to see a photo of black folks, where 100% of us are NATURAL(CHEMICAL FREE). talk abt a revolution mannnn!!

womyn i love:meet christina!

ok.hopefully this goes over well but this a test. seeing as i woke up at nearly 5am in the morning, with nothing much to do, i thought about the beautiful women that i've had the pleasure of being friends with and the influence they have had over me. then i started to think about my sad sad blog and how i could honor them on it. there are so many womyn i love, old and young, some i don't know from a bucket of chicken, and others i've had the pleasure of befriending, working with, and/or dating. now this is a test and i'm not sure how Christina, also affectionately known as Chris, will react to my disclosure. but here goes :)--Christina, girl, you're first up and i KNOW you are totally surprised and like WTF is India up to, but eyyyy-lol:

CHRISTINA! HA, I won't get into HOW i met her or WHO introduced me to this beautiful spirit :) but I will say that I was reintroduced to her at ATL's Black Pride. When we finally connected, she'd copy about 20 cds--all pretty much new music- for me. She introduced me to Kinnie Starr (one of my favorites), The Postal Service, Gomez, even Queen Latifah's jazz music, and so much more. When I saw Christina, I was stunned by her beauty--She has to have one of the best smiles on the planet. I was so nervous that I had a hard time opening the cd holder and I couldn't stop smiling or staring at her, of couuse using my peripheral vision, when we were together. LOL. We'd talked on the phone for months and had only seen pictures of each other from a mutual acquaintance. she was shocked that i was so nervous because on the phone i was like the life of the party, (WUT WUT shawty). LOL. anyway we ended up dating for a short period of time and fortunately the friendship outlasted the relationship which is pretty kewl deal to me.

I love Christina's occupation: she is wildlife firefighter, which initially sparked my attraction to her. SHE fights fires in the FOREST. HOW cool is that!! HA! She has excellent taste in music--and movies--she recommends the good shit. She use to--doesn't do this anymore, not sure happened-(LOL)-read books to me over the phone throughout our long distance romance (HAHA). that was so sweet--they were all lesbian novels too:)! and we would listen to the Beetles and Tracey Chapman and sing the lyrics together.awwww!!! It was like we were in high school...LOL-haha!!!!! Christina is so giving and omg, she was totally there for me as I struggled with my mother's passing and an abusive relationship! I talked to you/her every single night and yo, i'm crying now --because you were there for me GIRL when i needed you--all the way. I don't say it often, but I NEED TO EXPRESS your value IN ANY MEDIUM I CAN. You are so freaking smart, kind, thoughtful, and beautiful! THIS is ALL for you and altho' it may not be the Oprah Winfrey Show; it's my Show and you're the starrrrrrah!

CHRIS girl I LOVE YOU soooo much AND YOU WILL ALWAYS BE SPECIAL TO ME. THANK you for BEING such a journeywoman, a dependable loving friend, being fully present in an industry dominated by men, spreading your love juice everywhere you go, and being nothing short of ladyeagle through it all. wheeee! CONGRADULATIONS MAMA, now the world knows of your greatness..ok, ok about 10 people :), but still. I hope you're ok with my disclosure and i took your pictures a long time ago without telling you:D. Enjoy Mexico.

And that's Christina!! wooohu.....

Friday, July 14, 2006

esthero/my babymama creesummer/and definition of a pirate

i don't fawn over white women, i keep it nappy :)

BUT MY GAWD i love ESTHERO! i love her vibe, stage presence, voice, energy, her cute cute chipmunk-like mouth (i'm weird), and clothes-I'd the raid heck out of the closet and steal all her pink shoes. you tube!! i'm addicted mannn :-)! i present my girl...esthero aka lil dukes aka dukes UP!!!! and also check out my babymama Cree, the dreamy cree--if i ever move to the Bay, i promise i'll spent ample time hanging out at the vegetable market stands (or whatever they're called) because i'm certain to find her there and get a tight hug again...thankyou thomas for sending me this link. i think i'm going to cry now..now i need to find simone's blog.

yours truly,

pirate artemis passion flower, mistress of fierce tidal waves (from 2003-until)

Monday, July 10, 2006

taking an enema & implanting wheatgrass, yes!

my saturn return must be over, effective TODAY, because my dreams are unfolding in front of my big ol' eyes. the universe is opening up new directions and adventures for me and everything is making sense. for once, i am not nervous. i prayed, journaled, and sung a love song for this new direction. shift in focus. clarity in dreams. a life peristalsis, of sorts. after taking a !honest! life inventory, i made a decision to wipe that slate clean and start over from scratch and admit that i am/was a mess. altho' i didn't need confirmation, rob brezny-4sheezy forecast for the gemini did so without my permission. life is a self fulfulling prophecy, so i get what i *truly*believe i deserve, which essentially means that i am responsible for me. ME: India, the geekygoddess. i am interested in empowering myself and being in the company of other womyn willing to harness that energy for themselves and collectively heal the earth/communities/nation/world . i am a womyn who lives without fear. i am womyn whose mission is to align herSELF with the universe. a womyn who CHOOSES!to live boundless in mind body and spirit. I am a African god/dess among mortal womyn and men. a mountain womyn (thanks l'). a pirate. a ladyeagle. a femme that sometimes swaggers and bebops like a tomcat , and that inconsistency is ok too (thanks brandi!). a moon womyn, protectress of holistic healing. a fierce bodybuilder. a mindbuilder. a spiritbuilder.a mistress to crashing tidal waves. a yemaya descendent. !seeking companionship/to fall in love/to have a ridiculous amount of sex ;P et al was an attempt to cover up my loniness and fear of being alone and to have someone else validate me and my existence. during my time in NY (of all places) i recognized the difference between being alone and being lonely and being alone has its' reward. goodness i learned so much abt india, what she likes, what's important to her, and what direction she's wants to head. even with having those Aha moments, i want companionship/intimacy/amazing sex/a partner4life etc but it just ain't my focus. i'm redirecting the excess stored energy in my sacral chakras and sending it to my crown and 3E. because i see better with my eyes closed. this is my manifesto.

i. nkiru. a.

snippet of b. harper's brown eyed blues as i thank my Self for giving myself space and signing the permission slip to travel and learn abt the person in the mirror. next stop, michigan (camping @ womyns fest) and Arizona (backpacking)!

"If I knew being here with you today,
Would mean being alone tomorrow.
I would gladly trade all of my tomorrows away
For a moment with you."